At the end of 2011 when I decided I couldn’t continue in the state I was in (emotionally, mentally, physically, spiritually, LITERALLY) I decided I needed to be free from the chains that were binding me and had bound me for a very long time. I was encouraged by a pastor who was counseling me to live my life with intention and purpose and not look to others for fulfilment that they could never provide, to realize I matter and I am good enough. To rid myself once and for all of the lies that have kept me bound in chains.
I wrote the following and have placed it on my fridge and read it every day, sometimes more than once. It is my conscious choice to choose something new today! Like a list of things to do each day, things to remember and focus on so I don’t get lost along the way. This is posted on my fridge not just for me but for my children to realize who they are and what they are worth. So they will understand their value! I would like to share it with you.
I have to consciously choice forgiveness and grace.
I have to make a decision to lay down the past and pick up my healing.
I have to make a choice to realize that I have a voice, an opinion and they matter.
I have to make a choice to realize that people can hurt me – HOWEVER, they have no right to and should not be allowed to.
I have to make a choice to make good decisions based on what it best for me and my family.
I have to make a choice to do what lines up with the will of GOD for me.
I have to make a choice to affirm each day that I am worth it, that I matter, and that I am GOOD ENOUGH!
I have to make a choice to realize everyone doesn’t have to like me and I don’t have to do for others just because it is what is expected.
I have rights!
I have a voice!
I am worth it!
I am good enough!
I am important!
My ideas, opinions, feelings, dreams and goals matter!
I am a child of God, forgiven and free!
Maybe today you are struggling with all the reasons you don’t measure up, if anyone knew the real you – you are sure they would shun you and push you away. Maybe you were told things that are just not true. Hurting people hurt people and maybe that is what has happened to you! Maybe today you need to take out a piece of paper and begin to write your own statement of what you are worth and who you are! And if by some chance you are reading this and you have no place to start, I would love to pray for you, encourage you and share with you the things that God has shown me. Last year on more than one occasion I wanted to end my life. It was the darkest place and had I not heard the voice of God through my children I am not sure I would be here today! I couldn’t catch my breath. My eyes stung and my hears burned. I had hit a bottom and I never thought I would see up. Like the whisper of the wind He came into my dark place and He used many different things to show me I am not alone. I have value and I matter. I have said it before and I will say it again. I AM NOT MY SINS, MY SHORTCOMINGS, MY FAILURE. And my friend, neither are you!
Let today be a new day- let HIM reaffirm to you WHO YOU ARE! No more lies, no more fear. A new day bathed in His amazing GRACE!